Being Seen
Being 'seen' is unfortunately rare.
In our busy fast-paced world we miss out on connection - spending more time online than in person.
I love the intimacy of in-person conversations. I love seeing people's eyes sparkle and light up when a connection is made. Listening to people and being listened to is one of the greatest currencies that we have.
When I run retreats I get to sit in circles with beautiful, honest, real people. We sit and see and be seen. Having people witness your stories, your challenges and your dreams is not an experience that many people have the luxury of.
Most who come are strangers. Most are nervous. Most are unsure what they are in for! Having the courage to go somewhere new, to do something new and to meet new people is huge. They are way outside of their comfort zone!
When we sit in a circle, we're implicitly suggesting that we are all equal and that we are connected. A circle is inclusive and level. Talking circles are as old as time. We share stories. When we learn about others, we learn about ourselves.
Each one of us is a bookshelf of stories. Stories we believe or have been told about ourselves. Our stories define us. Sometimes we have stories that aren’t worth repeating. They are old, they are untrue. Sometimes we get stuck in a story and can't close the book. These stories then go from books and become T-shirts. They become part of our identity. We wear them, we share them. We identify with others who relate.
The stories we tell ourselves over and over again can also hold us prisoner as they can limit our experience of life and influence how we relate to the world.
What if we dropped our familiar stories? The first step is noticing the conversations that we are used to having with ourselves. The lines we constantly repeat.
Then there are the stories that we tell others. When people tell me a story, the questions of the wonderful Byron Katie are always useful:
Is it true?
Can you absolutely know it's true?
How do you react - what happens - when you believe that thought?
Who would you be without the thought?
Our lives are always moving in the direction of our strongest thoughts. Our thoughts are seeds that grow beliefs. The good news is that beliefs can be changed!
What's a story that you are sick of hearing? Or sick of telling?
What do you believe about yourself?
(If you are thinking about joining me at Repotted, I have only 5 spots left! Click here to find out more).
